Activecitizen54's Blog

Saturday Sass 02.07.14 The Secret Life of Walter Mitty

Posted in Uncategorized by activecitizen54 on February 8, 2014

Saturday Sass 02.07.14 The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, Monte, Lee, Woody whatever mask is pulled on out of convenience today.  A sociopath, a chameleon serving only the personal gain agenda of one without conscious. An ill Primate with a wounded mind that finds no objection to using others, that clearly states: “If I have my world and others have their worlds then why should I ever give a shit about anyone else, ever!”

The harmonic convergence of Chellie, Kevin, Manuel, Jorge and the Tropical disturbance of Torii Beach destruction is better understood especially with Charlie at the edges and Kevin’s still tenuous hold on the reality that unfolded with the purification from, the expulsion from and denial of entry to Torii Beach by the Crystal Meth addicted primates, whores for beer and the open thievery and attempted murder of a man guilty only of loving his friend Lee.

Thank the powers of the fates or the beginning of the Chinese year of the Horse; the sensitivity to the Force or whatever links Chellie, Manuel & Kevin in Harmonic Resonance once shared by Lee too.  Kevin heard, felt and understood his Sister’s duress and caught caught up with Chellie today through miracles of cyberspace.  Kevin will have his Sister of Light and Love back in this world with he and the luminous beings with determination to be her pillar this time. 

Kevin remembers the request for “just a little time” from Chellie.  She often feels things deeper and with a greater intensity that causes even the bravest souls to quiver and quake in fear and awe of the resiliency and abilities Chellie demonstrates to those able to observe.  Kevin took the request very seriously because he leaned hard upon Chellie’s talents and abilities.  Kevin has done the very best to return the gifts of strength, love, tolerance and direction to Chellie; to reflect back the light and love Chellie radiates to renew her strength to the very best of his ability from the very core of his luminous being still on this plane because of Kevin’s Sister of Light and Love’s courage in the face of intolerable pain, outrageous fraud and intentionally shattered dreams. 

Kevin heard, completely comprehended and immediately honored the request for time from Chellie and went silent into places He needed to go for self that Chellie plunged fearlessly into so she could help lead Kevin back to sacred ground. 

“My friend, the light of my life, in an act that well could’ve been absolute self-sacrifice built the link to bring me back to the light from the darkness that consumed me.”  Kevin quietly confessed.  “I fear above all else that I may have wounded her in that super-human selfless act of love.”

With that one gargantuan request met that God, Angels, Demons or Imps remove the pain of an absolutely abused, a beaten and broken man, guilty only of loving his friend, became mired in the filth created by Primates drawing him ever deeper into the merde maelstrom of their creation putting his very core consciousness and spirits under unrelenting siege from the evil powers of darkness.  It is Chellie’s quiet and Juggernaut-sure tearing the planks off the construction of reality that developed a cancer, a malignant growth, an evil and odious aura that left nothing unscathed and stained to the very core all that once was pure.  It is the beauty of steely determination of an all too frail human, a woman wielding life and death as primary weapons that retrieved the husk of human, the traumatized and withdrawn psyche of Kevin from the midst of pure insanity and suicide by careful design through her sheer will alone.

“I pray for forgiveness from my Sister for causing her duress on any level.  I am also eternally grateful and blissfully joyous for the brilliant light laying the darkness low when the purification of Torii Beach came upon me; when Chellie’s luminous vision bore down through the depths and refused to loosen her grip; the only option success in retrieving her friend Kevin.”  This quiet and loving man of twin souls would begin every day of this life in the now as gratitude and recognition of the sacrifice made, the risk clear and the damages insidious as he discovered too late. 

From the Primates the subversion of truth, honesty, love and compassion among friends turned to weapons of contempt and Punjab pits of pure evil willful ignorance determined to exact the toll of live sacrifice to gratify their craven needs. To bolster the illness consuming them like chemical Zombies eager to seize any healthy brain as their most reviled object.

Kevin observed in a quiet conversation with me; “I am humbled by Chellie, this ancient-of-spirit companion within this poisoned existence in the now as she too often became the only antidote for the putrid venom of vile, insincere and pure evil friends found-out, exposed in confession; revealed in the clearly voiced expectation “to just ignore” the thefts, the assaults the self-identifying accusations, digestion of the toxins and acceptance of the horrid hallucinations created by this chemically altered reality.  All this agony and suffering willingly shouldered and dispelled with the compassion of the war-weary veteran risen to Icon of Hope, Beacon of Bliss, Beauty and joy personified through the midst of Percival’s  flesh being torn and shredded from the bone.

This putrid poison, the venomous rants, the contemptible use of other humans may be the only honest display of emotion this Montgomery Lee Freeman and his Jim, Detriot77 the attack ape meth head alcohol pickled assholes are capable of then and now considering the real brain tissue structures and  brain chemistry damage from their consuming vaporized salts of Drain-O and Battery Acid inhaled, ingested or injected depending on the levels of desperation to escape the reality of their own creations.” 

There is no mistake between Kevin & Lee,  There is not a shred of honesty, integrity or real human compassion found within what is left of the poisoned seat of their lost intellects, surgically altered, Chemically altered, twisted perceptions from twisted minds unworthy of the trust, malignant by intent from absolute Contempt of Love, Unconditional, dog-loyal Love extended and returned in burning effigy of it’s opposite on the hoof stalking away on October 5, 2013 at dawn with the ejaculatory glee of utter premeditated destruction of another human as “Bliss.” 

Torture and terror it’s only intent from the creature that at one time was a luminous and beautiful natural child exploring and honoring life as Lee was held deep within Kevin’s heart and soul.  This creature now is living in fear of being found-out; never able again to face the light of day or the light of unconditional love, never again able to be honest with self, detect a shred of truth or uphold any sense of personal honor that demonstrates value of one’s self.  Absolute contempt of self reflected in any and every action in the remaining moments of it’s shallow and petty existence among the pack of Primates who continue to poison our youth; destroy our future poisoning one mind at a time and flinging feces from the shadows where they are merely maggots moving the flesh of reality by feeding frenzy on any positive energy source.  Obtaining bliss from destroying what is honest, true, right and without agenda of self.

As witness my heart and mind wept as my spirit was crushed under the staggering weight of verifying validity of accusations concerning Kevin’s conscious core complete with numerous pleas to Lee for a return to reality with:

What is it that you think I owe you Montgomery Lee Freeman?

What’s in it for Kevin?

What’s Kevin’s pay-off?

Who does it hurt if the whole freaking world knows: “I love my friend Montgomery Lee Freeman,” now or at anytime?

How does being loved, accepted, respected and treasured cause any damage?

How does a true friend’s concern for your health diminish you in any way?

Does doing my flat-out level best to insure security against insane odds, without support, without compassion, without reward define me as target?

 A beloved friend, Phillos, as family of choice, it is mutual consent that allows Kevin to honestly, candidly and without reservation say:  “I do love my friend Lee because of who he was, because of his character, courage and his conviction to find his own damned way.” 

“I love and admire the Montgomery Lee Freeman I know who has that droll twisted sense of humor that only the invisibly handicapped wield with master strokes.”  Kevin plead direct to the demon.

“I do not begrudge Lee anything in life or his pursuit of happiness knowing that I did my flat out level best to insure that all of the needs of Torii Beach were met for Kevin and for Lee’s support. I failed in that goal and I accept my failure.” Kevin admitted to Lee and witnesses: “However, the sabotage of income, the arrogant demands for turning our house into a closet for Lee’s tricks was never agreed to and is as repulsive as “The beautiful creature laying next to him” when seen in the full light of day and recognition of just what it is exposed.”

Kevin’s clear statements of facts bore profound witness to the depths of protection Lee enjoyed at Kevin’s expense.  “I held Lee harmless from any liability for Torii Beach save the water bill which he required to demonstrate residency for the Pinellas AIDS services and our plan was 3 incomes to support Torii Beach.  That plan became 2 with Corey & Cami’s pointed exit and Kevin sustained 2/3 of the costs or more after Lee’s quitting work to pursue his Clearwater Michael Parachute and drug dealing leading to the Frankie on 4th Ave N Crystal Meth induction and indoctrination hall of shame. Crowned by the Dave Dube 8th Wonder of the World show and marketing further diminishing any resemblance to the man that I know and love as Montgomery Lee Freeman.”

Kevin would ask; “Tell me what the pay off is in all that Lee?” 

“What is it that you feel you gained?  How are you enriched by the actions defining you in the here and now as you slither through shadows afraid to show your face to the light of day because of your exposure as a Primate addicted to Crystal Meth with only the slow suicide by needle that you diligently worked to attain as your prize?”  Kevin’s ire raised with the clear knowledge that slowly but surely these vile creatures are exposed and if not prison then death are their dwindling opportunities based in their own altered acts of self-loathing and hate projected onto others.

“Show me where I obtained any financial benefit from your eating out of my wallet, your bathing out of my wallet, your creature comforts out of my wallet and then your brazen demands that our house become someone else’s closet.  Your clear statements that I am not welcome in my own home because of your whore for beer; maggot from a dead pig’s ass Jim, Detriot77 “The beautiful creature sleeping next to you” was uncomfortable because I called his lying drunk ass out on day one. What a friend you demonstrate in that act Montgomery Lee Freeman.” Kevin could return the venom but chose the middle road where maybe words would be heard and understood someplace within what’s left of the gray matter.

“How dare you violate my privacy and steal from me when I was on a real, honest to goodness date for my birthday for Christ’s sake.  How do you ever look yourself in the eye in a mirror in the morning?”  Kevin’s outrage at the open thievery the displays of contempt freely delivered with no foundation but to define the addicts’ diseased brain function would overflow if allowed.

“What an arrogant asshole hard at work whom God spoiled by standing upright and giving teeth you demonstrate yourself to be and why Montgomery Lee Freeman?  Because your friend Kevin is clear about having no shame in loving you?”  The white hot words would melt through steel but fell upon deaf and drugged out brain cells unable to recognize truth and Kevin’s comprehension of this only fanned the flames of despair within him. 

“Had I not survived this experience with Chellie’s profound loving aid and the multiple witnesses I would be hard pressed to believe that I accepted this bullshit for as long as I did.  Figures don’t lie but liars sure do figure. It is with great clarity and accuracy that I remember delivering all the household records to Lee (he subsequently shared them with the Jew Jim that nasty gutter slime sure did take weeks of figuring before the best they could come up with is “Kevin didn’t pay the bills.”  LOL  It is a major freaking accomplishment that I kept the utilities on, food on the table, the internet services on with the open economic warfare and sabotage conducted by these vile addicts in their Meth-Crazed Paranoia.”  Kevin knew that pursuing this would trip his emotional balance toward something less than human and the tirade cooled.

“What possible motivation is there for anger, animus and attack on someone who loves, cares for and does his best to support without ownership, without expectation of anything more than maintaining a friendship.  A 16 year friendship and relationship of respect and honor of the other.” The words from Kevin to Lee fall on ears unable to hear and a brain unable to grasp the concepts of higher human qualities. 

“What changed?”

“The introduction of Chrystal Meth by Frankie on 4th Ave N, the Dave Dube poisons, the Brandon, the Riley and the delusional acts of paranoid primates unworthy of freedom to fling their feces or grind their organs across multiple counties in their venomous infection of Battery Acid & Drain-O salts pushed into my community preying on the youth, the disenfranchized in a criminal intent to heinous to fathom as anything other than intentional.”  Kevin quietly reminds himself that the Lee he once knew.  The man he loved and cared for has gone away and the Lurch-like looming husk of human unable to follow the complex thoughts; reduced to defecation in it’s hands to have entertainment in throwing pieces of self.

When one of us is silent we all feel the void. I am sorry for the silence Chellie.  I did what you required and surrounded you in strength to the best of my ability while taking the fearless tour of that shadow of truth in the past.

Such are the dangers of these links we share through no fault or cause of our own. These bonds are the immutable purity of strength, the pure essence of the power of like minds, harmonic souls and resonate hearts cannot be denied nor disparaged because of the real vibrations of the Universal Truth this represents to these unwilling icons with all their human frailty and undeniable resonance with truth, love and core consciousness that is only possible with divine direction.  We are all one, luminous beings of light and energy, stardust aware, self-aware and the rare gift of universal awareness for we of twin spirits.

I was terrified that the reality my Sister of Love and Light came to understand as my experience of primate breech of love, trust and pandering to poison passion was so damaging to Chellie; weakened by uplifting me through sharing her brilliant spirit in my darkest of hours need.  Chellie’s selfless acts of love, random acts of kindness and bearing witness to truth and anti-truth doing great damage to herself in the process.  We each would eagerly give our lives for the other but just not on this day, please.

As I drew the curtain of expectation away from reality in sharing with her the heartbreak of Torii Beach destroyed; Chellie went ashen gray of skin as the reality of the  Demise of Torii Beach struck her through my empathetic direction.  The thunderous beat of the brilliant heart of nature and love that Torii was for us gave way to the revolting reality of the attack of the detritus drawn in by the brilliant positive energy.

The absolute horror of seeing the poison,  hearing the graphic reality of threats to my life, the blinding flash of recognition of Universal Truth that she was absolutely repulsed to the very core of her spirit.  My soul wept silently as I shared the chronological events from Lee quitting work to Michael and Frankie and my own duplicity and ownership of error and fault.

  I recognized the recoil in horror even as I purged the pain to no one in particular.  The Ryka, our Wolf guide in her youthful charm an innocence presided over this telling of the truth.  This tribal ritual subverted by the Catholics in “confession”and  dismissed in the nuclear family with individual angst over all is a very important healing step for the wounded mind and the battered soul as men returning from combat know all too well.

I cherish my Guide and Friend Chellie for being there for me in this plunge to the depths that Dante could never have conceived.  I honored and respected the request to provide “time” with clarion peal recognition of fundamental need to tune.  With help from others, with some adult supervision and a little reliance on Gremlins and Wolves I am healing.  I am becoming stronger than before and I pray my friend Chellie will accept the strength, the love and the pure unadulterated admiration for the miracle in my life that she marks with each breath and I know that never again will Chellie be alone because of the bond forged in the confrontation of this evil.

And on a healthy note.  I stumbled across this profile I built at Adam4Adam. com expressing my anger and the absolute idiocy of Montgomery Lee Freeman through these trials and tribulations.  Through the Bi-Polar acts of: “Kevin you are the best,” and “Kevin you are nothing,” pendulum swings founded solely in the opinions of others as Lee’s once clear and directed mind became owned by the chemical baths and the tissue damage leading to ever increasing paranoia.

The profile heading is:

No Man’s Puppet, No Strings Attached

69, 6’2″, 180lb, 33w, Swimmer’s, Blond Hair, Some Body Hair, White, Looking for Friendship, 1-on-1 Sex, 3some/ Group Sex, Misc Fetishes, Relationship.
The detailed description of Kevin continues:
DOG UGLY
Lost in your own private Hell of not knowing what day it is from your Meth Addiction?
Keep right on moving.
Self involved to the point of believing someone else actually would care enough to “Check-Up” on you?
Take a long walk off a short pier or point a few grams on me…
Too lost in lies to ever become honest.
Keep right on moving.
Honest men.
Men of integrity.
Nothing else will be accepted.
Think your shit don’t stink?
Have to hide?
Discreet?
Crawl back under your rock.
This man is too good for sick druggie games now or ever.
My home is not ever going to be some cowards closet.
The murder by poison of my Imps, my Red Sided Eclectus Parrots early in the assault of Torii Beach in retrospect fully intended to be a warning to me but never voiced till late in the game and any mourning completely disallowed as Kevin was the only gainfully employed member of the household.
I would add to this litany the very real: “If you think I am ‘taking-care’ of you; that wasn’t part of this agreement Kevin and that’s not going to happen.  I am not now or ever taking care of you.” from Montgomery Lee Freeman the Meth Head in paranoid rant clearly demonstrating the narcissistic “it is always all about me.” 
I opened my home and heart to Montgomery Lee Freeman who repays me with these statements, who displaces the anger from his disability to anyone within striking distance.
This is the man who howled and whined half-truths and opinion as fact, feeding the Israeli Alcholic Attack  Ape and perpetual asshole Jim financial information about our home that are and were none of his business and Lee is an even bigger asshole by thinking he could take intellectual intimately shared information and disclose it, use it as weapon, employ it for his own goals.
“Buckets of Bullshit” and “Living off someone else’s money” are perfectly self-descriptive of the authors modes of operation rather than the human they were directed at in poisonous, absolutely venomous, meth-rage and insanity to the point of becoming violent.
The position of strength, the foundational knowledge beyond a shadow of a doubt that the human motivations of love, compassion and  community rose to the request for refuge, the plea for assistance in real human survival from Lee to a care-giver, Kevin with a Berdache Spirit a Koskalaka who rose to the request to encompass the wounded warrior Lee within the womb of family, encompassed in the tribe without a moment’s hesitation or fear.  This demonstration of real community, real family and tribe spoke eloquent volumes to the characters of the founders of the creche.
Kevin’s courage of one’s convictions, knowing in one’s heart and soul that they have reached their limit; followed one that they love and care about as if they were their own flesh and blood,  denied self to the abysmal pits of depravity where Lee decided to live and upon recognition; revolted Kevin as a bull drawn into an abattoir rears back and fights for his very life.
It is a rather “Tribal” structure here among the Urban Aboriginals and one’s status and social value is based upon what the “other” may obtain from you. Understanding this brings compassion and the delivery of honesty, knowledge and empowerment to those who may or may not be of lesser stature but are seen as requiring assistance.
Oh Joy; I am still being Berdache, Koskalaka of two spirits even among American Urban Aboriginal cultures. It is my lot in life Kevin resigns himself.
I miss my friend Lee today deeply for reasons I’m still unsure of exactly why. Companionship, fearless opposition, intellectual sparing partner, just a friendly voice. A man to be there.
Here I go again. LOL
(Return to laments of Lee ad nauseum.)
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